Robotic Hibird!
by Kara-sensei
Summary: Enzo ate Hibird. Without Hibari knowing, Dino replaces it with a robotic Hibird… created by Giannini.


**A/N:** My first attempt at a decent fanfic. Well at least I hope it's decent. *nervous laugh*  
But really, please enjoy the story. It's cute and silly, and I hope it leaves you smiling!

* * *

The sun, high in the sky, shone brightly on the town of Namimori. Many days have passed since Dino last trained Hibari. Truthfully, Dino had nothing else left to teach him but because Dino had a fetish for round-headed people like Hibari, he visited him often. Despite Hibari telling himself that he should bite Dino to death for disturbing the peace and crowding his breathing space, for some ridiculous reason, he was attracted to that Italian herbivore.

Dino had just finished a mission in Italy and was craving for some delicious home-made food made by everyone's favourite mother, Sawada Nana (Tsuna's devoted and caring mother). Unfortunately, for Dino, no one was at home to answer him. It was not unusual for Tsuna's mother to be shopping around at this time but to have absolutely no one at home was indeed quite strange. So now, Dino, who doubtlessly had nothing else to do, decided to visit Hibari in Namimori High. As expected, his trusty subordinates were with him, surrounding him from all sides. It was if Dino emitted some gravitational ability that attracted men in black suits. They were named Romario, Romeo, Mario, and a few others that all look relatively the same. Since Dino was young and handsome, he attracted many of the female students' gazes and attention. However, with Dino's subordinates around, many of the students had to look away or walk in the opposite direction in fear of them.

"Honestly, you guys don't have to keep following me around," sighed Dino.

Romario gave his moustache a small twitch. "But Boss, we don't want you to get into any troubles."

"The only ones causing troubles are you guys. So go do something else, I'll be fine." Dino said as he gave his hand a small wave, motioning them to go away.

"Ah I get it. You just want some alone time with Hibari-san, don't you?" smiled Romario, followed by the chuckles of the other subordinates. "Don't worry, we understand, Boss."

Dino was about to argue back but they were already walking away, silently laughing among themselves. "Man, those guys…"

Finally reaching the reception room, Dino froze at the door and began to panic. What should he say once he meets Hibari? All Dino could remember was each time he greeted Hibari informally, he got bitten to death. Perhaps he should try formally this time? But wouldn't that be too awkward?

Dino pulled out Enzo, his strange pet turtle, from the pocket of his jacket and began rubbing its shell back and forth - as if it was some ritual for good luck. Finally, he banged his head on the door as he gave up on thinking so much. _"What are you doing, moron? How hard is it to just say a hello?"_

Suddenly the door knob gave a jerky turn, causing Dino to immediately jump back. Without even thinking, as soon as the door opened, Dino quickly blurted, "Ah! Long-time-no-see-how-are-you-these-days-Kyoya?"

The person in front of him gave a small cough and Dino realized that it was not Hibari. Instead, it was the vice-president, Kusakabe Tetsuya.

"Good afternoon, Dino-san. If you're looking for the iinchou, he's in a committee meeting right now. You can wait in here until he comes back. Now if you excuse me."

Dino stepped to the side for the vice-president to leave.

"Ah okay… thanks!" Dino slowly mumbled, still dazed from earlier.

Dino walked into the quiet reception room and glanced around. There were comfy leather couches, as well as a small glass table in the middle of the room. A large desk piled by binders and papers was positioned near the windows that faced the school gates. In the corner stood a row of counter tops packed with mugs used for tea or coffee. Most of the mugs looked new and untouched. The room gave off a pleasant warm feeling and also somehow nostalgic. It was like the comfort you feel when you return home after a long period of being homesick. The room must have been for teachers to hang out during their lunch breaks but Hibari probably threatened them all in order to use the room for the Discipline Committee.

Staring at the mugs, Dino decided to make himself some coffee and perhaps some for Kyoya when he gets back. However, unsurprisingly, Dino was a real klutz without his subordinates around. Hence, this young mafia boss, with powers and responsibilities over thousands of families, somehow managed to made a whole mess in the reception room from simply making coffee (or an effort to make some, really). There were spills everywhere, from the counter to the floor, and a few broken mugs shattered here and there. Throwing his large jacket onto a chair, he began to clean up hastily. If Kyoya was to see this… well let's not go there.

"_Midori tanabiku namimori no… Dainaku shounaku nami ga ii…"_

Dino glanced around and saw a yellow ball of fluff flying through the window, landing on a large desk with its tiny feet. Dino immediately remembered that it was Hibari's bird, for it would always be sitting on his shoulders. Hibird cranked its neck at an angle, staring at Dino as if it was waiting for him to come over and play. Although tempted, Dino continued to clean up the mess he made. He was so concentrated that he did not notice that his little friend, Enzo, had escaped and grown triple the size due to the water spills on the floor. He also didn't notice the strange crunching noises in the background as he was cleaning up. Perhaps it was from stepping on some broken mug pieces.

Usually for any normal human being, cleaning up would only take a few minutes but thanks to Dino's clean-some-more-mess-some-more skills, it took him quite a while to turn back the reception room's original setting. When finally done, Dino collapsed onto one of the couches. He glanced over towards the window, hoping that perhaps the little birdie would still be there. Instead of seeing the adorable ball of fluff, he saw a bigger-than-normal-sized Enzo sleeping on top of the desk. "Woah! When did he get this big?" thought Dino as he walked towards the desk. "I better turn him back to normal size before Kyoya comes back."

As he reached to grab Enzo, he realized that something was sticking out of its mouth. He gave a closer examination to recognize a small yellow feather. No wait, it was not just a single feather, there were a whole bunch of them. Suddenly Dino's face began to lose colors. A horrible thought had just popped into his mind. In a flash, Dino was frantically looking around the reception room, looking for Hibird. He even sang the Namimori High anthem in a desperate attempt to lure the bird out. After looking through every inch of the room, he looked back at Enzo who was sleeping peacefully on the desk. There was complete silence until Enzo gave an abrupt burp.

Dino smacked his forehead with his palm. "Enzo… don't tell me you… you…"

"I was wondering who was making such a ruckus," said an oh-so-damn-familiar voice from behind.

"Kyaa-ya!" replied Dino as he spun around, mixing the word 'kya' and 'Kyoya' together.

Hibari stared from the giant turtle to Dino and back to Enzo again. A dark but effulgent aura began to form around him. As Hibari began his bite-you-to-death speech, the only thing Dino could hear was his own panicking thoughts. "_If Kyoya finds out his precious bird got eaten alive by my turtle, he will kill me! And worst, he will never forgive me! There's gotta be some way out of this!_"

"Hey." In one swift move, Hibari brought out his tonfas and had the body of one against Dino's throat. "Are you even listening?"

"Erm, yeah." Dino lied, as he stepped back and grabbed Enzo, who was fortunately still at a size light enough for him to carry. Dino slowly moved towards the door as he gave a nervous smile. "I just came to see how you were doing."

Settling the tonfas down, Hibari leaned against his large desk, with both legs and arms crossed. "You weren't listening after all. I was asking about the baby (Reborn). Is he around?"

But there was no reply. Dino has already left the room with Enzo, running like a frightened horse.

"HMM…" said Giannini, as he rocked back and forth in his round mechanical mini-ship. "That definitely sounds difficult! A mechanical bird that looks identical to a real one with multiple functions such as singing and talking. Oh boy, oh boy."

Clasping his hands together, Dino gave a desperate sigh. "I know this is difficult but please, Giannini! You're the only one who can invent such a thing! After all you're the son of Gianichi, the best Vongola engineer! In fact, I'm sure you'll even surpass your father!"

"Oho!" Giannini grinned, clearly enjoying the sugar-coated compliment. "Well you're lucky that I am still in Japan. Do not worry! I will not fail you, Chiavorone Boss!"

* * *

_That late afternoon._

It was quiet in the hallways except for the chirping of birds outside and the breeze that came from the open windows. All after-school activities had fully ended and there wasn't a single person left in the school. Well, all except for two. One was Hibari, whom was having some solitary moments with the clouds up in the rooftop. The second person was Dino, who was secretly entering the reception room to place Giannini's finished project on the desk.

Staring back at the bird, Dino thought, "_Will this actually work_?" The mechanical Hibird gave a '_Hibari Hibari_' chirp and that seemed to satisfy Dino's worries. Dino was about to return back when he suddenly heard footsteps echoing from the hallway.

"_Oh shit._" Dino quickly hid himself behind a couch. "_What excuse can I use if he finds me_?"

Hibari walked in and paused at the entrance for a bit but instead of walking over to where Dino was, he walked straight to his desk and began some paperwork. He seemed to be irritated by the mountain pile of paper on his desk. Dino gave a relieved but depressed sigh. "_Great, I'm stuck here until Hibari leaves. I should have come earlier._" Dashing straight out the door crossed his mind but the thought of Hibari chasing him after was too scary to even think about.

Dino was not given much time to relax because the mechanical Hibird was beginning to sing the Namimori's school anthem… rapper's style with a mixture of Giannini's voice.

"Hm…?" Hibari gave Hibird a suspicious look, obviously unpleased with the rap. "What are you doing?"

Hibird replied, "Whazzup, homie!"

"_GUH!_" Dino blurted out in silence. "_Hibari's going to fry that bird now_!" He stuck out his head out a bit to get a better view of Hibari.

To his surprise and relief, Hibari has not yet made his move. Instead he replied back to the bird, "You took one month to learn my song and yet you learned a foreigner's song in one day? Hmph, how insolent."

"_His speech is done. He's going to attack!_" Dino cried inside his mind. Even if it was only a mechanical bird, he could not bear to see it hurt. He was about to stop Hibari when to his surprise, instead of seeing tonfas being magically pulled out, Hibari lifted his arm and pointed a finger out. Seeing this cue, Hibird automatically flew and stood on his finger.

"Wha…" Before Dino could even comprehend the situation, Hibari began singing the anthem himself.

_The green that trails Namimori_

_Not large not small, Nami is best_

_Always unchanging_

_Vigorous and gallant_

_Let's sing together_

_Namimori middle school…_

Hibari's voice was magnificent. It did not sound like the old farts that sang the original anthem. It was beyond comparison between Hibari's voice and the ones that usually sang the anthem. During this entire time, the astonished Dino couldn't believe what his ears were hearing and especially what he was seeing! The soft breeze from the window blew Hibari's silky hair gently. His eyes were closed and for a moment, everything seemed to be frozen in time. The only things that seemed animate were Hibari's soft flowing hair, his mouth that moved swiftly with the lyrics, and more importantly, Dino's fluttering heart.

_Your and my Namimori_

_Common and enough, Nami is best_

_Always together_

_Vigorous and gallant_

_Let's walk together_

_Namimori middle school…_

"_Hibari's pride…_" Dino thought. "_His love and passion for this school. He expresses it within his anthem_." Dino remembered how the moment Hibari has heard that his school was a playground for the Varia ring battles, he had immediately rushed back to ensure its safety. Dino chuckled and leaned against the back of the couch. "_This kid… He's…_"

"**BANKAI!**"

"Eh?" Dino accidentally said out loud.

Fortunately for Dino, Hibari did not hear him because he was busy glaring at the mechanical Hibird. "Bankai…?" This time, there was definitely displeasure in his tone.

Hibird jumped off his finger and onto the desk. "Hibari, Hibari. Baka, baka."

Dino could sense Hibari's menace growing. "_I guess I have to do this myself then,_" thought Dino as he pulled a controller out of his pocket. Giannini's words echoed inside his head. "_Though I'm sure my project is mechanically 100% perfect, here's a remote controller. __Just in case_."

Now if only Dino knew how to work the controller.

Pressing a few buttons here and there, so far he only managed to get Hibird to say:

"Dattebayo~"

"Kufufu, nappo-chan."

"$#%!"

"I am your father."

"PUT YA GUNS ON, LET'S PARTYY!"

Finally, the last line, _'If you want to kill me, hate me, detest me, and survive in an unsightly way; run, run and cling to life_', got Hibari standing up with his tonfas out. Usually after he says 'I'll bite you to death', there would be no turning back. Luckily, before he could say his punchline, Dino managed to get the mechanical Hibird to sing the normal version of the anthem.

Lowering his tonfas, Hibari's tense eyebrows ceased a little. He held out his finger once again for the Hibird to return back to him. "That's a lot better. If you make another mistake, I w-"

_BLOP!_ A magnificent white dung landed directly on his shiny black shoes. It was perfectly dung-shaped too. If there were any sadists around, then they would say Hibari's expression would be priceless.

"_WHY THE HELL DID GIANNINI PUT REAL DUNGS IN A __MECHANICAL__ BIRD? AND WHY ARE THE BIRD POOPS PROPERLY DUNG-SHAPED?_" screamed Dino in his head as he broke the controller into two in frustration.

"So it was **you** causing all this trouble."

Dino glanced up to see Hibari towering over him, with his lovely tonfas in his hands. Dino is almost certain that he sees a shinigami behind him, ready to take his soul.

"K-Kyoya! I can explain! You see, he ate Hibird and I knew you won't be hap—"

"He?" interrupted Hibari, keeping his cold and immense tone.

"Enzo!" Dino cried out, almost like a child, as he took the turtle out of his jacket.

Hibari stared at the small sleeping turtle in his hands. "Hmph. I never knew you would sink so low to blame a turtle for your doings. Always disrupting the peace… **I'll bite you to death**."

"I love you, Kyoya."

They both turned to look at the mechanical bird. There was silence until the bird repeated itself again. "I love you, Kyoya~"

Dino immediately took this chance of distraction to grab the mechanical bird and escape out the doors. "I'm sorry, Kyoya. I'll see you another time!"

There was brief silence before Hibari finally lowered his tonfas. "Hmph."

* * *

_Midori tanabiku namimori no_

_Dainaku shounaku nami ga ii _

Resting in front of his desk with his legs propped up, Hibari yawned as a yellow ball of fluff came flying through the window and nested right on top of his hair. "Is it fun? Is it fun?"

"Heh heh… perhaps."

As Hibari continued to lean back on his chair, he looked outside his window and couldn't help but give a somewhat childish grin.

"That idiot horse."


End file.
